Favourite FART smell Page 2

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  • Syrette 7 Oct 2012 21:39:37 44,213 posts
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    jonsaan wrote:
    Syrette wrote:
    Pumpatron wrote:
    Dunno what happened there.

    Anyway, my flatmate once mistook my fart for some kind of tasty meat I was preparing for tea.

    He was practically licking the air until I pointed out it was my guff he was so enthusiastically inhaling, at which point his expression turned from curious appreciation to disgust. :D
    Sweet Jesus
    Is that what a fart of that calibre is named?
    You'd have to ask Pumpatron.

  • Deleted user 7 October 2012 21:51:24
    Savory Jesus
  • Pumpatron 7 Oct 2012 22:27:49 389 posts
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    I'm yet to think of a worthy name. It was the kind of fart you do once in a life time.
  • mattigan 7 Oct 2012 22:36:27 1,429 posts
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    To add to the 'your own' comment, if you visit the loo just after another 'has blown it up' I find that the smell is immediately neutralised if you drop one of your own, its like your brain automatically disregards all ouders the second you cut the cheese, evolution at work!
  • sirtacos 8 Oct 2012 02:41:50 7,378 posts
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    Kimchi makes for the most acrid stench. It's fucking rank. Worse than beans and egg.

    If you eat a kimchi hotpot with egg, god help you.
  • ibenam 9 Oct 2012 20:56:01 1,538 posts
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    I share an office with a few people,

    The real challenge for me is not my actual work but trying to follow these 3 deceptively difficult steps everytime i need to let one rip:-

    1. Hold it butt clenched till they leave for a toilet break / fag / general walky.

    2. Then release assuming I still have it saved and its not "lost"

    3. Then make the smell go away before they come back.

    Number three is the real killer, how do you lose the smell of last nights curry!
  • neilka 9 Oct 2012 21:01:35 16,527 posts
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    Why don't you just go to the toilet you dirty bugger?

    BAAANG!!!!! EXPLOTION!!!!!

  • ibenam 9 Oct 2012 21:04:39 1,538 posts
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    It may get mixed in with other peoples odours, I like my farts like Scarface likes his cocaine.

    Pure and filtered.
  • barchetta 9 Oct 2012 21:14:16 1,387 posts
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    After a family outing to local woodland we all came down with a giardia based infection from dodgy (though at the time it looked quite clear) stream water. Kids were playing and splashing around in it and we adults joined in too. Fun.... that afternoon. A week later, the house smelling like a spillage at Portman Down, a trip to the docs and some stool tests later, the fun was somewhat overshadowed.

    I distinctly remember the sponge filling of my office chair being able to hold quite a quantity of uncut giardia guff. Quite funny to see someone else hop on it, only to squeeze the noxious fumes out of the sponge and turn a funny shade before finding another desk to work at. :-)
  • ILoveThrashMetal 9 Oct 2012 21:50:01 825 posts
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    Leather trousers are a good storage facility. You can let rip hours before and still have the strong whiff of air biscuits when removed later on.

    Arsechickens

  • bobmar360 9 Oct 2012 22:15:39 926 posts
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    Kebabum
  • FWB 9 Oct 2012 22:33:15 45,587 posts
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    Mentioned this in another thread, but there should be a name for that kind of fart you produce in the shower when you're soaped up. That mixture of sweet (scented) and sour.
  • ibenam 9 Oct 2012 22:57:50 1,538 posts
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    Dissapointingly squeezing one out in the bath results in no smell at all.

    I guess smell cant travel through h20?

    At least the bubbles somewhat make up for the lack of smell.

    Edited by ibenam at 22:59:10 09-10-2012
  • captainrentboy 9 Oct 2012 23:43:17 1,106 posts
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    I'm pretty sure mine are still odour filled, even when let out in a bath. Each bubble has its own stench pocket.
    Do mine defy the laws of science?
  • Deleted user 10 October 2012 00:01:33
    Pro tip: for THE best fart sound humanly possible, next time one feels a sizeable bum bubble forming deep within the cheese chamber whilst taking a shower, stand slightly forward - back facing the downpour of warm water, then proceed to prize the cheeks apart, using the firm grip of one's hands and aim the steady sprinkle directly between one's stench trench and releeeease.

    I assure you you have never heard a fart like it in your life.
  • barchetta 10 Oct 2012 00:59:00 1,387 posts
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    Heh, that needs a profanisaurus entry. Something like 'Niagara Calls'
  • neilka 10 Oct 2012 01:03:37 16,527 posts
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    This thread is more repulsive than the Jimmy Savile thread.

    BAAANG!!!!! EXPLOTION!!!!!

  • FuzzyDuck 10 Oct 2012 03:20:33 4,897 posts
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    @CaptainQuint

    Hehe, i love doing that!

    I first discovered when i had the notion of trying to blow a bubble with the water! :D
  • Dirtbox 10 Oct 2012 07:56:53 79,200 posts
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    Pumpatron wrote:
    Dunno what happened there.

    Anyway, my flatmate once mistook my fart for some kind of tasty meat I was preparing for tea.

    He was practically licking the air until I pointed out it was my guff he was so enthusiastically inhaling, at which point his expression turned from curious appreciation to disgust. :D
    This is glorious, the uid is the icing on the cake.

    +1 / Like / Tweet this post

  • Dirtbox 10 Oct 2012 07:56:53 79,200 posts
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    Registered 12 years ago
    Pumpatron wrote:
    Dunno what happened there.

    Anyway, my flatmate once mistook my fart for some kind of tasty meat I was preparing for tea.

    He was practically licking the air until I pointed out it was my guff he was so enthusiastically inhaling, at which point his expression turned from curious appreciation to disgust. :D
    This is glorious, the uid is the icing on the cake.

    +1 / Like / Tweet this post

  • RobAnybody 10 Oct 2012 09:18:23 945 posts
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    Why the hell am I reading this thread .......... and laughing my arse off? :)
  • ibenam 10 Oct 2012 13:21:07 1,538 posts
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    CaptainQuint wrote:
    Pro tip: for THE best fart sound humanly possible, next time one feels a sizeable bum bubble forming deep within the cheese chamber whilst taking a shower, stand slightly forward - back facing the downpour of warm water, then proceed to prize the cheeks apart, using the firm grip of one's hands and aim the steady sprinkle directly between one's stench trench and releeeease.

    I assure you you have never heard a fart like it in your life.
    stand slightly forward - back facing the downpour of warm water, then proceed to prize the cheeks apart, using the firm grip of one's hands

    Did not know where this was going but pleasantly suprised in the end!

    I wont even ask how you came to learn this! :D
  • Deleted user 10 October 2012 14:09:15
    Experimentation is crucial in the innovation process.
  • barchetta 10 Oct 2012 15:02:19 1,387 posts
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    ...and necessity is the mother of invention.
  • bennyw01 Ad Trafficker, Gamer Network 10 Oct 2012 15:48:18 257 posts
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    Warm Louisiana Swamp
  • JoeBlade 10 Oct 2012 18:33:39 2,632 posts
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    Dougs wrote:
    Surely the only correct answer is "your own"
    An old tune by the Levellers popped into my head reading that:
    There's only one smell of farts and that's your own, your own, your own.
  • ibenam 10 Oct 2012 21:34:59 1,538 posts
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    If Budweiser did farts...

    http://s03.imageupper.com/1_t/3/P13499014881504655_1.jpg" />]

    Edited by ibenam at 21:39:35 10-10-2012
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