From Daily Star - you gotta tick all the boxes:|
1 5'5" with stacked trainers
2 Obese, or malnourished - nothing inbetween
3 Bloodshot eyes
4 Greasy hair. Five day old hair-gel.
5 No dress sense.
6 Knows the best apps.
7 A beer or lager or red bull drinker.
8 A non-smoker.
9 Wears jeans for months without washing them, new t-shirt.
10 Gets ready in 17 minutes.
11 Earns around £28,000 a year.
12 Wants a Playstation Vita.
13 Loves on-line shopping.
14 Eats crisps.
15 Watches HBO.
18 Enjoys watching football on Sky.
19 Rides the bus.
20 Well-educated in multiple programming languages.
21 Earns more than his Mum.
22 Jokes around and has a laugh.
23 Nerd-rage you are upset.
24 Tells you he loves you only when he wants pocket-money.
25 Admits it when he looks at other porn-sites.
26 Has a mario kart licence.
27 Bored now.
28 Can ride a bike.
29 This doesn't seem such a good idea after all, but I'll post it anyway.
30 Talks his mother regularly, when she cleans his room.
How do you match up?
Are you Mr Perfect?
Bremenacht 21,602 posts
Seen 2 hours ago
Registered 8 years ago
31 Ability to see a thread a few posts down from the top
neilka Funniest Forumite, 2014 17,008 posts
Seen 9 hours ago
Registered 10 years ago
32 Ability to read a post before replying
33. Wipes cock on curtains.
34 Only scans the username then mentally blocks out the rest
35 Doesn't quite get the point of making a thread the next day
36. Must not eat all the 'flavours' in crisp multipacks first, leaving only ready salted.
Fatiguez 8,826 posts
Seen 1 hour ago
Registered 7 years ago
Joke's on them, because I'm actually rather fond of ready salted.
KayJay 5,316 posts
Seen 22 hours ago
Registered 9 years ago
What does "Ready Salted" actually mean?
I mean, Ermm. I don't know what I mean. Do you know what I mean?