Are you Mr Perfect? Page 2

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  • nickthegun 11 May 2012 16:27:01 61,056 posts
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    MetalDog wrote:
    And hairy chests FTW (on men, anyway)
    Bird never make nest in bare tree

    ---------------------------------------------------------
    My man gives real loving that's why I call him Killer
    He's not a wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am, he's a thriller

  • neilka 11 May 2012 16:28:33 16,467 posts
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    Remind me to take my bronze swimming certificate with me on my next date.

    BAAANG!!!!! EXPLOTION!!!!!

  • sport 11 May 2012 16:30:01 12,798 posts
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    neilka wrote:
    Remind me to take my bronze swimming certificate with me on my next date.
    :-D, and a visible nicotine patch.
  • ram 11 May 2012 16:32:29 3,486 posts
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    14 & 24, I have a bicycle made of meat.

    I get a lot of girls.



    And terms in prison.
  • glaeken 11 May 2012 16:44:36 11,238 posts
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    Dam so close. I am only missing about 15.
  • Razz 11 May 2012 16:46:00 61,600 posts
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    Is it weird to become aroused when someone licks your Nipples?

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    Steam/PSN/XBOX: Razztafarai | 3DS: 1246-9674-8856
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  • glaeken 11 May 2012 16:47:57 11,238 posts
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    I think it depends how rough their tongue is.
  • Razz 11 May 2012 16:49:17 61,600 posts
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    The rougher the better? So like a cat. Hmmm... dunno I quite lke it smooth with plenty of salvia.

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    Steam/PSN/XBOX: Razztafarai | 3DS: 1246-9674-8856
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  • Bremenacht 11 May 2012 16:49:41 19,393 posts
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    Or, if it's an animal.
  • mrpon 11 May 2012 16:49:58 29,427 posts
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    Is Nipples the name of a pet?

    Give yourself 5 or gig, you're worth it.

  • glaeken 11 May 2012 16:51:16 11,238 posts
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    They need a tongue like sand paper. Possibly my nipples are not that sensitive though.
  • Bremenacht 11 May 2012 16:51:28 19,393 posts
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    Hairballs wouldn't be arousing.

    Hairy balls might.
  • sport 11 May 2012 16:51:44 12,798 posts
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    http://www.eurogamer.net/profiles/Nipples
  • Razz 11 May 2012 16:53:25 61,600 posts
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    I don't think Nipples would like it if I licked him though. I'm quite sure that sexual assault... though McM did grab my arse once.

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    Steam/PSN/XBOX: Razztafarai | 3DS: 1246-9674-8856
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  • Deleted user 11 May 2012 16:54:26
    nickthegun wrote:
    1. Girlfriend drives a Honda
    2. Has workout tapes by Fonda
    MY ANACONDA
    DON'T
    WANT
    NONE
    UNLESS YOU'VE GOT BUNS
    HON
  • Spunkweazle 11 May 2012 17:00:47 470 posts
    Seen 6 hours ago
    Registered 5 years ago
    Thats Fantastic news!!

    I meet ALL 30 criteria, but have always assumed that women wouldnt be interested in me because of the cronic bed wetting, the 1 inch penis, the heroin addiction, the leprosy, and the pile of dead hookers in my child sex dungeon.

    But it turns out i am Mr Perfect

    I will rinse some of the blood and fecal matter off my Audi and go out on the pull tonight

    http://www.scottyslittlesoldiers.co.uk/
    dedicated to supporting the children of men and women killed while serving with the British Armed Forces.

  • asha 11 May 2012 17:15:18 1,991 posts
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    sport wrote:
    1 Six foot tall.
    2 Muscly, toned and athletic.
    4 Short, dark hair.
    5 Smart dress sense.
    8 A non-smoker.
    9 Wears smart jeans, shirt and V-neck jumper.
    10 Gets ready in 17 minutes.
    11 Earns around 48,000 a year.
    15 Watches soaps.
    16 Clean-shaven.
    17 Smooth-chested.
    19 Drives an Audi.
    20 Well-educated.
    21 Earns more than his partner.
    24 Tells you he loves you only when he means it.
    25 Admits it when he looks at other women.
    26 Has a driving licence.
    27 Can swim.
    28 Can ride a bike.
    29 Can change a tyre.
    30 Rings his mother regularly.
    Those are the ones that don't apply to me.

    ( ͡ ͜ʖ ͡)

  • neilka 11 May 2012 17:18:08 16,467 posts
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    asha wrote:
    Those are the ones that don't apply to me.
    Don't you just offer to make them brimful of asha?

    BAAANG!!!!! EXPLOTION!!!!!

  • Deleted user 11 May 2012 17:20:11
    rodpad wrote:
    Is there some equally bollocks female equivalent list?
    It's being compiled in the Jade Raymond article comments on the front page.
  • jonsaan 11 May 2012 18:14:58 25,438 posts
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    Brown eyes indeed.

    Phnar

    FCUTA!

  • smoothpete 11 May 2012 18:18:34 31,709 posts
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    Yeah what's with the brown eye thing? Racists.

    edit - pffft, "brown eye" :p

    Edited by smoothpete at 18:22:12 11-05-2012
  • Deleted user 11 May 2012 18:19:55

    5 Smart dress sense.
    15 Watches soaps.
    16 Clean-shaven.
    17 Smooth-chested.
    30 Rings his mother regularly.
    31 Likes gladiator movies.

    Edited by meme at 18:20:15 11-05-2012
  • Dirtbox 11 May 2012 18:30:19 78,822 posts
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    I do pretty well on that list, except I drive a bmw which cancels everything out.

    +1 / Like / Tweet this post

  • Fatiguez 11 May 2012 18:47:54 8,756 posts
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    Billy_Sastard wrote:
    /cock waves on internets
    /but nobody pays him any mind

    show me your tits u bitch from ubisoft

  • jonsaan 11 May 2012 19:00:36 25,438 posts
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    Stinks of cheese round here?

    FCUTA!

  • MrTomFTW Moderator 11 May 2012 19:09:14 39,362 posts
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    Dirtbox wrote:
    I do pretty well on that list, except I drive a bmw which cancels everything out.
    Wow, you really are a cunt!

    Follow me on Twitter: @MrTom
    Voted by the community "Best mod" 2011, 2012 and 2013.

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