The best blagues ('sly jokes') of François Hollande.

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  • Deleted user 2 February 2012 08:48:41
    Found the following Yahoo article quite amusing; unfortunately, it was in French and I've failed to find an English translation anywhere:

    Les meilleures blagues de François Hollande

    François Hollande, as you all no doubt know, is the Socialist Party's candidate for the French presidential election of 2012. Here's a trio of his more humorous comments, that I've translated with my limited French and the assistance of more than one dictionary:

    1) What is a sardine?

    A whale which has undergone five years of Sarkozyism.

    2) What do you call a disease which consists of gesticulating all day, speaking in order to say nothing and lying all the time?

    The UMP (Sarkozy's Party).

    3) What do you call an UMP deputy with two neurons?

    Gifted.

    Edited by EndlessSolitude at 08:55:45 02-02-2012
  • Salaman 2 Feb 2012 09:05:06 19,066 posts
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    I can see this getting to 10 pages. by 2020 or so

    They're all in the "dad jokes" category but I guess it's a novel way for a politician to give his colleagues a gentle ribbing.

    His Jean_marie LePen joke:
    What's the difference between yoghurt & JMLP?
    After a certain time yoghurt develops some culture.

    And his Strauss Kahn joke:
    What does DSK say to his wife after making love?
    I'll be home in half an hour darling.

    No thigh slappers but no doubt a good way to get yourself quoted in the media and with a bit of luck you get under an opponents skin a bit.
  • Salaman 2 Feb 2012 16:12:17 19,066 posts
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    and not long after I read this topic, I read he's had a bag of flower tipped over his head. I guess one lady found his jokes a bit lacking then.
  • cianchristopher 2 Feb 2012 16:22:09 6,360 posts
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    God, they're fucking terrible, aren't they? What the fuck does he do, just stand up at a political rally and start reaming off these shite jokes one-by-one? Fucking hell.

    Christ, that second one posted in the OP is like a joke told by a humourless freak afflicted with the most severe form of mental retardation.
  • Fatiguez 2 Feb 2012 16:25:45 8,738 posts
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    These sound about as 'sly' as a brick to the head. I don't get it. Maybe it's a French thing
  • Popzeus 2 Feb 2012 16:29:55 8,330 posts
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    Is this the same bloke who writes Carambar wrappers?

    Currently playing: Standing In A Car Park Simulator 2013

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