Celebrity Paedogeddon (now feat. other celeb sex offences) Page 106

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  • DaM 5 Mar 2014 11:56:21 14,166 posts
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    twelveways wrote:
    What if I abused myself and filmed it?
    I think that would be fine. Maybe start a new thread for it?
  • mrpon 5 Mar 2014 12:34:17 30,585 posts
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    DaM wrote:
    twelveways wrote:
    What if I abused myself and filmed it?
    I think that would be fine. Maybe start a new thread for it?
    http://www.eurogamer.net/forum/thread/94384
  • Youthist 14 Mar 2014 14:10:10 10,777 posts
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    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-26574292

    Innocent or not, it is a real shame to see Clifford getting some of his own medicine, is it not.
  • Youthist 14 Mar 2014 14:21:33 10,777 posts
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    Defence barrister Richard Horwell QC told the woman that she could not have seen Mr Clifford's penis because she described it as "tiny".
    "His is an average-sized penis," he said. "That shows you cannot have seen it."

    The witness replied that she had seen it and that "I did notice that it was small".

    Quality stuff.

    Edited by Youthist at 14:24:07 14-03-2014
  • askew 14 Mar 2014 14:30:38 13,425 posts
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    gLOL - did he pop it out for his lawyer?
  • imamazed 14 Mar 2014 14:32:54 6,218 posts
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    askew wrote:
    gLOL - did he pop it out for his lawyer?
    "Yeh to be fair, that's tiny; I wouldn't worry about a guilty verdict mate"
  • TheSaint 14 Mar 2014 14:34:04 15,765 posts
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    During another phone call, the man talked about Mr Clifford's penis and asked her to do the same, which she declined.
    If he gets off on hearing people talk about his tiny cock then this whole witness testimony must be a major deposit in the wank bank.
  • nickthegun 14 Mar 2014 14:42:27 64,291 posts
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    Its-a me, Maxio! Lookatta tiny goomba!
  • Load_2.0 14 Mar 2014 14:47:42 20,965 posts
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    Surely the Jury must decide whether or not he has a tiny cock?
  • imamazed 14 Mar 2014 14:48:40 6,218 posts
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    Also, we've only established that he's got a small tallywhacker when flacid. He could be a grower.
  • nickthegun 14 Mar 2014 14:50:54 64,291 posts
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    Well... theres only one way to find out.
  • mrpon 14 Mar 2014 14:52:33 30,585 posts
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    Surely you warm it up first before slapping it out?
  • askew 14 Mar 2014 14:53:13 13,425 posts
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    Puts a different spin on the instruction "All rise"
  • Moot_Point 14 Mar 2014 15:04:25 4,778 posts
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    Load_2.0 wrote:
    Surely the Jury must decide whether or not he has a tiny cock?
    The Jury must see all the evidence, so yes.

    Edited by Moot_Point at 15:04:59 14-03-2014
  • chopsen 14 Mar 2014 15:17:19 17,219 posts
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    That is really brave defence.

    "I can't possibly have done it, m'lud, as I have a large penis."
  • nickthegun 14 Mar 2014 15:18:44 64,291 posts
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    In your medical opinion, what would you class as a 'tiny' penis?

    An inch on the soft?
  • Youthist 14 Mar 2014 15:25:14 10,777 posts
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    Can you imagine the BBC team who were putting the report together. There is no way they wouldn't have been pissing themselves.
  • imamazed 14 Mar 2014 15:29:45 6,218 posts
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    nickthegun wrote:
    In your medical opinion, what would you class as a 'tiny' penis?

    An inch on the soft?
    Yeh I'd say that's about right.
  • CosmicFuzz 14 Mar 2014 15:47:30 28,837 posts
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    I heard he'd been in the pool before taking it out.
  • PearOfAnguish 14 Mar 2014 16:01:16 7,549 posts
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    That is the best thing I've read all week. Max Clifford faking an Italian accent to get a woman to talk about his tiny penis? Brilliant.
  • CosmicFuzz 14 Mar 2014 16:12:26 28,837 posts
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    What a technique though. Do girls tend to say something like, "Let's see if we can't make it a bit bigger?" or something?

    The italian accent is great. I'm going to start calling the "I couldn't have done it because I have a big penis" the 'Max Clifford' defence.
  • The-Bodybuilder 15 Mar 2014 07:03:57 14,920 posts
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    Claiming innocence based on not having a small willy takes some... balls.
  • Load_2.0 15 Mar 2014 08:24:59 20,965 posts
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    PearOfAnguish wrote:
    That is the best thing I've read all week. Max Clifford faking an Italian accent to get a woman to talk about his tiny penis? Brilliant.
    Oh come on, like we all haven't been there!
  • nickthegun 15 Mar 2014 09:32:06 64,291 posts
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    Average dick, you must acquit
  • mothercruncher 15 Mar 2014 10:15:02 9,721 posts
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    nickthegun wrote:
    In your medical opinion, what would you class as a 'tiny' penis?

    An inch on the soft?
    Please tell me that's average? :(
  • FWB 15 Mar 2014 10:20:26 48,541 posts
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    Enormous slong, the prosecution is wrong.
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