bbclol or How the BBC is turning into The Day Today

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  • Flightrisker 22 May 2009 00:33:54 18,072 posts
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    The headlines tonight...

    *Gong*

    Lettuce nose-stuffer avoids jail

    *Gong*

    Teacake set to cost taxman 3.5m

    *Gong*

    Gers star hurt by exploding egg

    THIS IS THE NEWS









    .... Post similarly odd BBC stories here!
  • Psychotext 22 May 2009 00:40:19 52,777 posts
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    Flightrisker wrote:
    Gers star hurt by exploding egg
    What the hell sort of retard microwaves an egg?
  • TakeTheVeil 22 May 2009 00:43:30 5,058 posts
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    I do.. some mornings anyways. Quickest way to 'hard boil' an egg (~1min). I've got a lil container for it though.
  • Psychotext 22 May 2009 00:44:29 52,777 posts
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    I always assumed that would end in face melting... pretty much every microwave I've ever bought had it as a huge warning in the manual.

    (That's obviously for eggs in their shells... which is what I assume happened to the guy in the story)
  • Dynamize 22 May 2009 00:44:47 1,672 posts
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    BBClol. A professional institution.
  • Lukus 22 May 2009 00:46:22 18,955 posts
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    Psychotext wrote:
    Flightrisker wrote:
    Gers star hurt by exploding egg
    What the hell sort of retard microwaves an egg?

    "Broadfoot had already been ruled out for the rest of the season because of other injuries. "

    From boiling water in his toaster and cooking soup in the deep fryer, presumably.

    Paintings & Photographs

  • Flightrisker 22 May 2009 08:58:03 18,072 posts
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    US 'banana gun robber' slips up

    "If he had had a gun he would've shot me," Mr Mabe told the Winston-Salem Journal newspaper. "But he had a banana."
  • Chopsen 22 May 2009 09:03:01 15,164 posts
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    Dynamize wrote:
    BBClol. A professional institution.

    Ah, bless
  • Deleted user 22 May 2009 09:04:46
    Lukus wrote:
    Psychotext wrote:
    Flightrisker wrote:
    Gers star hurt by exploding egg
    What the hell sort of retard microwaves an egg?

    "Broadfoot had already been ruled out for the rest of the season because of other injuries. "

    From boiling water in his toaster and cooking soup in the deep fryer, presumably.

    If you'd ever seen the guy play football it would put his egg-sploits into perspective.
  • LeoliansBro 22 May 2009 09:05:04 41,863 posts
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    Superb OP. Genuinely.

    LB, you really are a massive geek.

  • Nasty 22 May 2009 09:05:12 4,726 posts
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    Lukus wrote:
    Psychotext wrote:
    Flightrisker wrote:
    Gers star hurt by exploding egg
    What the hell sort of retard microwaves an egg?

    "Broadfoot had already been ruled out for the rest of the season because of other injuries. "

    From boiling water in his toaster and cooking soup in the deep fryer, presumably.

    :D
  • pjmaybe 22 May 2009 09:07:03 70,676 posts
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    Exploding eggs should be taken seriously - I mean those fuckers really go up when they blow! I had one of those little microwave boiled egg container things, microwaved the thing for the required time (1 minute) and then gave it the standard 30 seconds settling time. It literally started hissing after about 10 seconds then blew up with one of the most spectacular pops I've ever heard. Quite cool really, aside from embedding egg into just about every crevice of my old kitchen.

    Great stories though and spookily enough we were only discussing how much the Beeb is like TDT this morning in t'office.
  • Chopsen 22 May 2009 09:08:34 15,164 posts
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    I'm going to be microwaving eggs this weekend. I like explosions.
  • Deleted user 22 May 2009 09:14:29
    Chopsen wrote:
    I'm going to be microwaving eggs this weekend. I like egg-splosions.

    You're just not even trying.
  • rudedudejude 22 May 2009 09:32:13 2,100 posts
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    haha, what's worse is, you lot are paying the BBC to produce this shit!

    ahahahahaha!
  • DaM 22 May 2009 10:06:50 12,606 posts
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    To be fair to the numpty hun, he was poaching an egg, presumably in one of those plastic things.
  • Psychotext 22 May 2009 10:15:04 52,777 posts
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    DaM wrote:
    To be fair to the numpty hun, he was poaching an egg, presumably in one of those plastic things.
    Probably put a pan of water in the microwave to do it. :D
  • Flightrisker 22 May 2009 16:00:52 18,072 posts
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    'Duck island' claim MP to retire
  • ecureuil 22 May 2009 16:02:44 76,016 posts
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    Dynamize wrote:
    BBClol. A professional institution.

    I thought you'd linked me to BBC Wales for a moment there.
  • Flightrisker 22 May 2009 22:30:50 18,072 posts
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    Toddler buys real digger online
  • lucky_jim 22 May 2009 22:42:50 5,161 posts
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    I've mentioned this on here before, but I'll say it again. A bit less than ten years ago, I remember the local (London) BBC news reporting on the then-fairly-new introduction of "smart water", that stuff that glows under UV to help detect thefts. They finished the piece with the phrase "criminal egg all over his face". Seriously.
  • Deleted user 25 May 2009 02:50:58
    Retiring Army goat's new zoo home

    GONG
  • Fozzie_bear 25 May 2009 08:57:32 15,313 posts
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    Oh dear.

    Not really a lol at the bbc, but surely it's a bit 'Day Today' for the Chancellor of the Exchequer to be claiming the cost of an accountant to tell him how much his tax bill should be?

    Support the Mowgli Dirty Protest!

  • Deleted user 25 May 2009 13:15:16
    Fozzie_bear wrote:
    Oh dear.

    Not really a lol at the bbc, but surely it's a bit 'Day Today' for the Chancellor of the Exchequer to be claiming the cost of an accountant to tell him how much his tax bill should be?

    I also love the justification that he did it to ensure he paid the right amount of tax, too. Uh, so in order to ensure he doesn't cheat the taxpayer out of any tax on his earnings, he uses some of our taxes to check he's paying the right amount.

    Also kinda alarming to note we're now on day 18 of expenses 'revelations' now. O_o
  • Dan234 25 May 2009 13:31:54 2,232 posts
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    The thing is if you run a businesses or fill in an self assessment form you can't claim expenses for the cost of an accountant.

    Also the quote from Vince Cable on that page: "Many of us have spent years trying to change the system but we've been blocked many times." Presumably his change would be increasing the amount of time you can claim backdated expenses?
  • senso-ji 25 May 2009 13:33:39 5,309 posts
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    lol, just heard a five live news bulletin where the broadcaster said "There's been international condemnation at North Yorkshire's decision to carry out underground nuclear tests"
  • lucky_jim 25 May 2009 13:44:54 5,161 posts
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    Those Lancastrians have had it coming for centuries.
  • Deleted user 27 May 2009 21:07:52
    Glowing monkeys 'to aid research'
  • Khanivor 27 May 2009 21:12:11 39,875 posts
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    That's not lol, that's awesome.
  • Deleted user 27 May 2009 21:20:38
    It's Day Today.
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