Snippets of Overheard Conversations Thread Page 15

  • Page

    of 22 First / Last

  • mrpon 16 Mar 2012 13:24:45 28,997 posts
    Seen 2 hours ago
    Registered 8 years ago
    "If I guess your starsign will you talk to me?"

    A chugger.

    Give yourself 5 or gig, you're worth it.

  • localnotail 21 May 2012 16:29:27 23,093 posts
    Seen 7 months ago
    Registered 6 years ago
    OK, it's not overheard, but I've just seen this on my Freegle group:

    "Hi im in desberate need of some turd please for the back gardem for kids to play on need about 10m sqr can collect many thanks"

    A strange game. The only winning move is not to play.

  • CosmicFuzz 21 May 2012 16:31:31 24,576 posts
    Seen 8 minutes ago
    Registered 8 years ago
    Finally, a customer!!

    Everyone knows Jack Thompson - but how did he become the game-blaming activist he is today? Read Part One of my new mini-series!

  • CosmicFuzz 6 Jul 2012 18:03:56 24,576 posts
    Seen 8 minutes ago
    Registered 8 years ago
    Woman on phone behind me:

    "I'm about to give you a damn good reason to go to Whitby in a minute.

    ...

    It's a goth festival."

    Everyone knows Jack Thompson - but how did he become the game-blaming activist he is today? Read Part One of my new mini-series!

  • PazJohnMitch 7 Jul 2012 11:25:49 8,135 posts
    Seen 8 minutes ago
    Registered 7 years ago
    This is from last year when I was looking around Cambridge. I think it was around the Downing college.

    American Man: Wow that is amazing. I have never seen anything like this before. It must be very old. Is, is it pre-war?

    Cambridge Gatekeeper: It is pre-America.
  • RedSparrows 7 Jul 2012 11:34:07 22,888 posts
    Seen 12 minutes ago
    Registered 7 years ago
    Haha. Reminds me of being on Port Meadow in north Oxford, and seeing an American point at a church tower in Jericho and say 'that must be the college'.
  • yegon 7 Jul 2012 11:47:15 5,300 posts
    Seen 10 hours ago
    Registered 11 years ago
    Kind of fake and not related, but when my brother and I went to school, whenever we walked past the lollipop lady, every day for 3 years we enthusiastically had the same conversation;

    "And then it exploded in his face!"

    She must have thought we were crackers :)
  • DFawkes 7 Jul 2012 12:15:41 23,047 posts
    Seen 9 minutes ago
    Registered 9 years ago
    A woman on the bus:

    So anyway, I got distracted and mixed up the tins, and ended up serving my hubby the dogs food. He really enjoyed it too! But I didn't want to waste the Steak so gave that to the dog.

    Oh for goodness sake, I've caught my scrotum in my zip again - Margaret Thatcher, 1986

  • JBlokeUK 7 Jul 2012 12:28:29 2,308 posts
    Seen 1 year ago
    Registered 4 years ago
    Stewardess on a flight from New York to Las Vegas back in 2001 I was sitting in front of, who was reading a magazine.

    "phwoar I wouldn't mind sitting on his face"

    I turn around and she turns bright red, saying that she could have sat on my face and I wouldn't have complained.

    I like it when he's angry.

  • Alastair 7 Jul 2012 12:54:12 15,884 posts
    Seen 9 minutes ago
    Registered 13 years ago
    PazJohnMitch wrote:
    This is from last year when I was looking around Cambridge. I think it was around the Downing college.

    American Man: Wow that is amazing. I have never seen anything like this before. It must be very old. Is, is it pre-war?

    Cambridge Gatekeeper: It is pre-America.
    Did this really happen?
    It's quite a famous quoted snippet of conversation. Not saying it didn't happen, just that I've heard it before...
  • PazJohnMitch 7 Jul 2012 18:13:10 8,135 posts
    Seen 8 minutes ago
    Registered 7 years ago
    Alastair wrote:
    PazJohnMitch wrote:
    This is from last year when I was looking around Cambridge. I think it was around the Downing college.

    American Man: Wow that is amazing. I have never seen anything like this before. It must be very old. Is, is it pre-war?

    Cambridge Gatekeeper: It is pre-America.
    Did this really happen?
    It's quite a famous quoted snippet of conversation. Not saying it didn't happen, just that I've heard it before...
    Yes it was true. (At least I think it is).

    I doubt it was the first use of it as a retort. I imagine it was in a film or something originally and the gatekeeper probably keeps it as a stock reply.
  • RedSparrows 7 Jul 2012 18:16:34 22,888 posts
    Seen 12 minutes ago
    Registered 7 years ago
    Given the amount of tourists, and the attitudes of some in Oxbridge, I can well imagine.
  • thelzdking 8 Jul 2012 17:43:57 4,367 posts
    Seen 1 month ago
    Registered 5 years ago
    Earlier today in a branch of Waterstones.

    Teenage girl: Doesn't it feel like we're on a ferry?

    Father: Where's mum?

    Teenage girl (loudly, and like Harry Enfield's Kevin): She's in the toilet, having a poo.

    Father: What's wrong with her?
  • el_pollo_diablo 11 Jul 2012 17:19:59 2,088 posts
    Seen 1 hour ago
    Registered 10 years ago
    Post deleted
  • S.J.Rogers 1 Aug 2012 18:20:45 3,557 posts
    Seen 11 months ago
    Registered 9 years ago
    2 girls walking into Tesco just now...

    ''otherwise i end up with really green nickers''
  • CosmicFuzz 1 Aug 2012 18:32:12 24,576 posts
    Seen 8 minutes ago
    Registered 8 years ago
    Ah, nothing worse than profusely sweating out your fanny.

    Everyone knows Jack Thompson - but how did he become the game-blaming activist he is today? Read Part One of my new mini-series!

  • EMarkM 1 Aug 2012 21:42:28 3,174 posts
    Seen 15 hours ago
    Registered 7 years ago
    Heard on the bus, my daily commute, last year (but the girl who said it still gets on every day). She was chatting to her friend on her mobile:-

    "Have you ever...have you ever done it up the arse? Only we did last night. Everyone says it hurts but it was fantastic..."

    Pretty girl, too! Just my type...
  • S.J.Rogers 2 Aug 2012 16:11:13 3,557 posts
    Seen 11 months ago
    Registered 9 years ago
    I wonder why my GF was riding the bus..? :-)
  • glaeken 2 Aug 2012 16:46:26 11,199 posts
    Seen 33 minutes ago
    Registered 10 years ago
    Gym instructor doing an induction on a new member trying to work out a training program for them.

    Gym instructor "So how many times will you be coming to the gym each week?"

    Inductee's response "Oh I won't be coming every week"

    Not sure how the instructor then continued from that start but they did. I guess as long as they pay they don't care to much if their idea of training is utterly retarded.
  • ILoveThrashMetal 3 Aug 2012 11:21:48 739 posts
    Seen 1 hour ago
    Registered 3 years ago
    Not overheard,but all sitting down for lunch when my misses who I work with stuck her head round the door and said 'when you've finished your tea can you go upstairs and put your cock in the sink'.

    Arsechickens

  • Psychotext 3 Aug 2012 12:06:58 54,301 posts
    Seen 9 minutes ago
    Registered 8 years ago
    I don't even...
  • Salaman 3 Aug 2012 12:20:38 19,136 posts
    Seen 16 minutes ago
    Registered 10 years ago
    ILoveThrashMetal wrote:
    Not overheard,but all sitting down for lunch when my misses who I work with stuck her head round the door and said 'when you've finished your tea can you go upstairs and put your cock in the sink'.
    eh?
  • neilka 3 Aug 2012 12:28:39 16,102 posts
    Seen 4 minutes ago
    Registered 9 years ago
    It's shaped like a plunger.

    Lastly, I am gay, disabled, and a liberal.

  • lucky_jim 3 Aug 2012 12:38:20 5,308 posts
    Seen 1 hour ago
    Registered 12 years ago
    @ILoveThrashMetal
    I presume she meant "cup". Although she's clearly got cock on her mind, you're getting lucky tonight.

    Edited by lucky_jim at 12:41:03 03-08-2012
  • Ged42 3 Aug 2012 13:02:51 7,736 posts
    Seen 5 hours ago
    Registered 7 years ago
    "It's time to grab your pants and run."



    As overheard on the train just now.
  • warlockuk 3 Aug 2012 13:19:26 19,180 posts
    Seen 14 hours ago
    Registered 10 years ago
    neilka wrote:
    Apparently these things cut both ways - from today's Metro letters page:
    "Thanks to the trio on the Strood to Maidstone train whose Skyrim conversations brighten up my otherwise dull train journey. Kate, Kent"
    Heh. I've been on that train a few times; dull doesn't even cover it. Strood's one of those places that needs to be nuked from orbit.

    I'm a grumpy bastard.

  • EMarkM 3 Aug 2012 13:32:24 3,174 posts
    Seen 15 hours ago
    Registered 7 years ago
    One middle-aged woman to another, yesterday:-

    "...and with an arse like that, she deserves everything that's coming to her..."
  • thelzdking 3 Aug 2012 13:46:44 4,367 posts
    Seen 1 month ago
    Registered 5 years ago
    EDIT: wrong thread!

    Edited by thelzdking at 13:47:24 03-08-2012
  • Vortex808 4 Aug 2012 19:57:57 7,215 posts
    Seen 24 minutes ago
    Registered 6 years ago
    Small random child running past us like a daftie in the park earlier: "Weeeeeeee."

    You'd need a hard heart to disagree with the simple joy of just running about.
  • Agent_Llama 4 Aug 2012 23:08:35 3,359 posts
    Seen 18 hours ago
    Registered 9 years ago
    'Na, Whitney's bruvver ain't dead, he's just run away.'

    3DS: Mooky - 2019-9643-8311
    NNid: Agent_Llama
    Vita/PS3/360: Faloola
    FFXIV ARR: Alekzander Lockhart, Odin

  • Page

    of 22 First / Last

Log in or register to reply