Spider season already :( Page 4

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  • Lexx87 30 Mar 2008 14:17:03 20,869 posts
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    Flies yes, wasps no.

    Speak the truth hussy!

  • S.J.Rogers 31 Mar 2008 15:20:36 3,557 posts
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    Kill all Wasp's..!

    Spiders are OK in the UK, but I was in Oz 5 years ago and met some very nasty ones.

    Stole my wallet and beat me up... :-)

    Saw the Sydney Funnel Web and some huge yellow spider in the middle of a massive web in the Blue Mountains. The guide told me to keep well away from it..! O_O
  • PiD 31 Mar 2008 15:23:13 3,566 posts
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    urgh

    :(
  • S.J.Rogers 31 Mar 2008 15:35:10 3,557 posts
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    PiD wrote:
    urgh

    :(

    The invasion has started..!
  • Danoxth 31 Mar 2008 16:05:38 286 posts
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    Used to live in Australia in the Outback on an Orange and Grape Orchard.

    We kept getting one bloody spider (new it was the same one as it only had 7 legs) keep running into the house.

    Saw some "insect" completely destroying a huge spider (wolf) in an epic battle on my neighbours doorstep. No idea what the hell the insect was, wasn't going to stick around either.

    As for wasps, I agree on the notion that they are yellow and black striped bastard, similar to traffic wardens in some regards I suppose.
  • Salaman 31 Mar 2008 16:15:33 18,239 posts
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    Lexx87 wrote:
    Fuck fuck fuck, spiders are coming out at home. It's too fucking cold for spider season i'm sure! Can't stand the fuckers...hate them hate them hate them!

    Serisouly, you're a bit late to noticve no?
    I've had the first wolf spiders sneaking in since the end of Feb.
    They're quite small still btu I expect them to show up palm of hand sized again soon.

    :-/ I don't mind them much but the gf is freaked out by them.
  • Salaman 31 Mar 2008 16:19:50 18,239 posts
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    DDevil wrote:
    Spiders are VERY much for the win.

    Like this one I caught back in 2005.

    That's the ones I always find in my place. I tend to put them outside or ignore them if the gf isn't about.
  • Deleted user 31 March 2008 19:01:28
    S.J.Rogers wrote:
    PiD wrote:
    urgh

    :(

    The invasion has started..!

    Nest of orb spiders, those big buggers you get outside your window or between trees.
  • Lexx87 4 May 2008 14:41:57 20,869 posts
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    /twitches

    Speak the truth hussy!

  • Xeaon 5 May 2008 18:33:48 608 posts
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    Nightmare!

    Not my house btw, just taken from another forum.
  • Deleted user 5 May 2008 19:01:51
    Xeaon wrote:
    Nightmare!

    Not my house btw, just taken from another forum.

    OH MY GOD.

    I would have a serious stress realted incident if I saw that in my house........ or anywhere to be honest infact the picture makes me want to throw up.
  • Aranel 5 May 2008 20:50:31 669 posts
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    Why is it that spiders terrify me and yet I feel the strange need to click on every single picture link in this thread even though I *know* it will scare the sh*t out of me and will give me nightmares tonight :(

    God I hate spiders. And I'm going to sleep badly for the rest of the week now :(

  • Mashum 5 May 2008 21:12:59 154 posts
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    ....me too, I'm now sat all hunched up with my feet underneath me on the sofa... brrr...
  • Gretters 5 May 2008 21:38:42 2,628 posts
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    I don't 'get' the wasp thing. It's most likely because the one time I was stung, it hardly hurt at all so I've not got 'the fear'. Plus, wasps don't look like Hellspawn and move in such a completely alien way.

    Spiders though... I agree with the poster who said they're plotting the annihilation of the Human Race. Why do they need so many eyes? Why can they make climbing ropes with their arse? Have they ever offered any reasonable explanation for moving like a bad Harryhausen effect? Is eight legs not just being greedy?

    Anyway, wasps = not my favourite thing in the world, but not that arsed about them.

    Spiders = sheer, primal terror. Regardless of size (with the one exception of Money Spiders (the properly mini ones that you can only just see - obvious reasons) and I still don't think I could touch one.

    Spiders. Must. Die.

    But I can't do it because I can't get near enough to them. One came at me in my office a while ago and I scurried back into the open-plan bit and demanded that someone, anyone help me. One of the secretaries explodermerated it on the wall with my diary, and I had to get a new one*.

    I reckon it's a genuine phobia, and when she give me the old 'They're more scared of you than you are of them' schpeel, I just explained that a: "I doubt it, given it was pursuing me across the sodding office" and b: "I'm just glad I've not got one of the 'proper' phobias like going outside or clouds or something."

    Both valid points.








    *Diary, not spider. That would make no sense.
  • Mashum 5 May 2008 21:42:32 154 posts
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    Wasps don't hide, watching you all day, with their hundreds of eyes then scuttle out to dance on your face while you sleep. A wasp will immediately join in honest, if slightly one sided, combat. I respect the wasp - I might even try to heard it out of the window or door - but spiders must all die.
  • Gretters 5 May 2008 21:47:40 2,628 posts
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    HybridR wrote:
    I've never even been stung by a wasp. Why am I so shitting terrified of them? Hell if I know :(

    Oh also, for all the spider-haters, you have it lucky: spiders don't fucking FLY.

    For fuck's sake man... don't five them ideas!

  • Gretters 5 May 2008 21:56:44 2,628 posts
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    Although, it does put me in mind of something that happened at Uni.

    We had a bunch of foreign students in our halls in first year, and one of the coolest blokes was a Greek guy called Socrates (Socks).

    Now, I wasn't there for the beginning, but did wander down the hallway to hear the rapidly-escalting shreiking panic.

    My mate reckons that the creature in question was a Daddy Long Legs, but I don't know whether they're that uncommon in Greece, and all I heard was the screaming.

    Socks (screaming in a bizarrely American-ised accent): "Man! Don't tell me what I saw, man! It was a fucking spider!...

    Me (thinking to myself): Ah, a kindred spirit. One who will not mock my affliction.

    Socks: ...a fucking FLYING SPIDER!...

    Me: O_O

    Socks: ...A fucking spider with fucking WINGS, man!"

    Me: /cold sweat... /back to room... /sit in a corner and rock very very gently.
  • Retroid Moderator 6 May 2008 00:23:45 44,501 posts
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    Xeaon wrote:
    Nightmare!

    Not my house btw, just taken from another forum.
    FUCKING CHRIST

    I actually forgot to breathe for a few moments when I saw that pic. God.... all of those tiny ones, and they'll all grow up the size of that mother one.....

    O_O

    ;_;
  • thefilthandthefury 6 May 2008 00:25:15 24,901 posts
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    Retroid wrote:
    Xeaon wrote:
    Nightmare!

    Not my house btw, just taken from another forum.
    FUCKING CHRIST

    I actually forgot to breathe for a few moments when I saw that pic. God.... all of those tiny ones, and they'll all grow up the size of that mother one.....

    O_O

    ;_;

    I don't think I'll be getting any sleep tonight :(
  • StixxUK 6 May 2008 00:44:25 7,170 posts
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    I just set that as my desktop background purely because it makes my skin crawl.

    Good times.
  • S.J.Rogers 6 May 2008 15:27:54 3,557 posts
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    thefilthandthefury wrote:
    Retroid wrote:
    Xeaon wrote:
    Nightmare!

    Not my house btw, just taken from another forum.
    FUCKING CHRIST

    I actually forgot to breathe for a few moments when I saw that pic. God.... all of those tiny ones, and they'll all grow up the size of that mother one.....

    O_O

    ;_;

    I don't think I'll be getting any sleep tonight :(

    I will be awake all night with you...

    I may pjone you for help..!

    /I am fully aware we have never met.

    I am just feeling the FEAR...!!!
  • deem 6 May 2008 15:29:46 31,641 posts
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    Gretters wrote:
    Although, it does put me in mind of something that happened at Uni.

    We had a bunch of foreign students in our halls in first year, and one of the coolest blokes was a Greek guy called Socrates (Socks).

    Now, I wasn't there for the beginning, but did wander down the hallway to hear the rapidly-escalting shreiking panic.

    My mate reckons that the creature in question was a Daddy Long Legs, but I don't know whether they're that uncommon in Greece, and all I heard was the screaming.

    Socks (screaming in a bizarrely American-ised accent): "Man! Don't tell me what I saw, man! It was a fucking spider!...

    Me (thinking to myself): Ah, a kindred spirit. One who will not mock my affliction.

    Socks: ...a fucking FLYING SPIDER!...

    Me: O_O

    Socks: ...A fucking spider with fucking WINGS, man!"

    Me: /cold sweat... /back to room... /sit in a corner and rock very very gently.

    hehe
  • Futaba 6 May 2008 16:32:37 3,426 posts
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    I don't mind spiders, I find flies far more irritating.

    As far back as I can remember I always wanted to be a ninja.

  • JuanKerr 6 May 2008 16:35:21 36,094 posts
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    Grown men who are afraid of spiders in Britain need their heads checked - even the biggest ones are fucking tiny compared to a human.

    Spiders are brilliant: if you're not a complete pussy, watch them spin a web one day. It's fascinating. Plus, their webs catch annoying flies, gnats and mosquitos, so that makes them even better.
  • LeoliansBro 6 May 2008 16:53:20 41,863 posts
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    I refer you to Xeaon's post up there. It takes a lot to make me genuinely flinch when a pic comes up.

    LB, you really are a massive geek.

  • JuanKerr 6 May 2008 16:55:06 36,094 posts
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    Oh noes, a spider that can't hurt you and just hangs around in its web waiting for a fly to eat. Mate, you live in Catford - there are far more scarier things to worry about than spiders.
  • LeoliansBro 6 May 2008 17:03:40 41,863 posts
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    I know, I had a dream about jumping poisonous snakes last night.

    LB, you really are a massive geek.

  • JuanKerr 6 May 2008 17:09:07 36,094 posts
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    I've been having some weird and disturbing dreams lately.
  • RM2KMaster 6 May 2008 17:38:28 3,283 posts
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    JuanKerr wrote:
    Grown men who are afraid of spiders in Britain need their heads checked - even the biggest ones are fucking tiny compared to a human.

    Spiders are brilliant: if you're not a complete pussy, watch them spin a web one day. It's fascinating. Plus, their webs catch annoying flies, gnats and mosquitos, so that makes them even better.

    It's not about being scared of them hurting you, just the whole way they're built. It's a phobia.
    I bet you're scared of something that other people would call you a complete pansy for.
  • Retroid Moderator 6 May 2008 17:41:37 44,501 posts
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    Brooker says it best
    What's the point of spiders anyway? They're just mobile nightmare units put on the Earth to eat flies and frighten people by scuttling out from under the TV stand and lolloping crazily toward you. Non-arachnophobes just don't get it. Fear of spiders isn't a choice, but a residual evolutionary trait that some people have and some don't, just as some people can fold their tongues and others can't. When I see a spider, I'm across the room before I know what's happened, like an animal running from an explosion. It's not learned behaviour, you patronising idiots. It's automatic code, hardwired into the brain. Some brains. My brain.

    Once, when I was a student, I was preparing a meal in a hall of residence kitchen when some japester ran in carrying a huge spider he'd found outside. Having made a couple of girls scream, he decided to lunge in my direction. Without even thinking, I swiped at his belly with a kitchen knife in a desperate bid to stave him off. The blade narrowly missed him, which was a shame, because it meant I had to spend the next half-hour listening to him self-righteously bleating about how I must be crazy and he was only having a laugh. I just shrugged. Don't startle someone with a knife in their hand unless you're prepared to face the consequences, moron. Next time I'll go for the eyes.
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