@Blerk
I find myself th a bit of time at my hands which means that I get to read a bit more and provide some feedback.
So Chapter 10 at last.
The chapter kicks off with a high tension moment. Maxwell is quickly turning into a main force of malice appearing in the most inconvenient moments. I also like how keeping the book hidden in his work desk is actually a rather naïve idea. He still behaves like he is in a normal situation that has gone slightly out of control, while the actual threat that his situation poses to him and the other civilians is only now slowly dawning on him.
Without knowing it he has stumbled into a situation where he is now living in a de facto totalitarian fascist state.
I like this a lot because the severity of the situation is dawning to me almost as slowly as it is to the protagonist which helps slowly building the drama of the story which is still increasing in increments.
Alison and Kate suddenly disappearing. Creepy.
Well that it was Alison’s husband who disappeared is less of a surprise. It does play well into the GeStaPo methods on display though. Although I am now wondering if the fire was an attempt to stop something from happening or if it was to stop a science team from insurrection and/or if it was something done to get a hold of Alison without raising to much suspicion.
At the very least this will increase the power of the military even more.
So the team that gleefully set fire to a house with their alien guns was the one that found the house with the scientists burning. Right. Now I have strong tendency towards the scientists being killed by the military and Hayes being the only one who escaped. It also meshes well with the whole ‘under no circumstances approach or talk to him’ spiel.
Another thought occurred to me as Jenson was talking about him and his father leaving. AS everyone but the military team is basically trapped on the new world no one would ever know if the people wo returned home would find a tragic end once they had been released back into freedom. Although if suddenly someone appeared out of nowhere claiming to be a part of a secret government project to invade parallel dimensions they would be dismissed as crackpots.
Still as things are going I do worry about the health of pretty much everyone by now.
Like father like son…
It is a bit reckless to head out on the very first night when he does not even know if they are going to check if everyone is home after curfew or if there is some other form of headcount. From his home he could be also be looking if there was a change in the patterns of the patrols or anything. But then he said it himself, time is of the essence. What evidence maybe left might soon be gone. Especially if all the extra military is not patrolling the compound but instead roaming the outskirts looking for Hayes or cleaning up the mess left behind.
Minor style niggling. ‘Time was of the essence’ is used twice in a rather short interval here. Once in the room with Jenson and Dan and then again at the harbour making it stand out a bit.
And a great ending to the chapter.
There remain many open questions and it is hard to see how our protagonist will make it back home unseen.
Looking forward to more.
So get cracking!
I find myself th a bit of time at my hands which means that I get to read a bit more and provide some feedback.
So Chapter 10 at last.
The chapter kicks off with a high tension moment. Maxwell is quickly turning into a main force of malice appearing in the most inconvenient moments. I also like how keeping the book hidden in his work desk is actually a rather naïve idea. He still behaves like he is in a normal situation that has gone slightly out of control, while the actual threat that his situation poses to him and the other civilians is only now slowly dawning on him.
Without knowing it he has stumbled into a situation where he is now living in a de facto totalitarian fascist state.
I like this a lot because the severity of the situation is dawning to me almost as slowly as it is to the protagonist which helps slowly building the drama of the story which is still increasing in increments.
Alison and Kate suddenly disappearing. Creepy.
Well that it was Alison’s husband who disappeared is less of a surprise. It does play well into the GeStaPo methods on display though. Although I am now wondering if the fire was an attempt to stop something from happening or if it was to stop a science team from insurrection and/or if it was something done to get a hold of Alison without raising to much suspicion.
At the very least this will increase the power of the military even more.
So the team that gleefully set fire to a house with their alien guns was the one that found the house with the scientists burning. Right. Now I have strong tendency towards the scientists being killed by the military and Hayes being the only one who escaped. It also meshes well with the whole ‘under no circumstances approach or talk to him’ spiel.
Another thought occurred to me as Jenson was talking about him and his father leaving. AS everyone but the military team is basically trapped on the new world no one would ever know if the people wo returned home would find a tragic end once they had been released back into freedom. Although if suddenly someone appeared out of nowhere claiming to be a part of a secret government project to invade parallel dimensions they would be dismissed as crackpots.
Still as things are going I do worry about the health of pretty much everyone by now.
Like father like son…
It is a bit reckless to head out on the very first night when he does not even know if they are going to check if everyone is home after curfew or if there is some other form of headcount. From his home he could be also be looking if there was a change in the patterns of the patrols or anything. But then he said it himself, time is of the essence. What evidence maybe left might soon be gone. Especially if all the extra military is not patrolling the compound but instead roaming the outskirts looking for Hayes or cleaning up the mess left behind.
Minor style niggling. ‘Time was of the essence’ is used twice in a rather short interval here. Once in the room with Jenson and Dan and then again at the harbour making it stand out a bit.
And a great ending to the chapter.
There remain many open questions and it is hard to see how our protagonist will make it back home unseen.
Looking forward to more.
So get cracking!
