So I got really ill in my twenties (think cancer) and it destroyed my hormone balance amongst other things (yay chemo) and this left me with several metabolic issues post treatment (common) and PCOS (yay, no kids).|
I also had to go on steroids for years, so contrary to popular belief, I didn't look like the wasting away cancer patient (well I did at one point), I looked round faced, very bloated and frankly awful, but I pretty much didn't give a shit as I was, you know, alive. But going from a size 10 to a size 18 was pretty devastating, especially in your 20s, that's not when you want to be a fatty.
I met my boyfriend, now husband around this time, so he started dating a thin girl (10), got engaged to an obese girl (20) , married a fat girl (16), and is now married to a podgy girl (12).
Throughout this period of time he's been really supportive of it, and without him I would not have been able to lose the weight, he's done it, not by attacking but by being really nice about it. Yes there have been some odd gifts (Happy birthday, you can't cycle but here's a cute bike!) but overall he's just encouraged me to be accountable for what I eat and what exercise I do, without saying "you're disgusting lose weight".
I'm convinced that he continued to love me no matter what my size was, as I was always the same person underneath and to be honest a lot of it was that he was just glad to have me around, no matter what shape I was in
I think if you don't have that commitment to someone, if you wouldn't want them around at any cost, if you feel that changes in their appearance are lessening your feelings for them (and it sounds like a lot of that is having an issue with her attitude and lifestyle choices and them no longer meshing with yours) then maybe you should have an honest conversation with her about how you feel and either plan to make changes together ("we'll both cut out takeaways, we'll both cut out alcohol" etc), or plan to end the relationship.
From a "lazy fatty's" point of view I fucking hated being overweight and have really fought it (I ran regular 10ks at a size 18, just a bit slowly, rode my bike 16 miles to work etc ) and always did a lot of exercise but what is easy to put on can be really difficult or slow to work off, so yeah, it can be tough being a fatty (first world problem, etc )
#8323526, By simplerotation Overweight Women/girlfriends
simplerotation 332 posts
Seen 6 months ago
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