Virtual Console Roundup Review

By Dan Whitehead Published 12 January, 2008

Alien Storm and Startropics.

Version tested: Wii

Remember last week, when I jokingly said it was unlikely that we'd wake up one morning and find GoldenEye on the VC for just 500 points? Well since that dream scenario has since become even more unlikely than ever, let's see what retro bitches the Nintendo pimp has lined up for us this week.

StarTropics

  • Platform: NES
  • Wii Points: 500
  • In Real Money: GBP 3.75 / EUR 5.00

Zelda. Zelda, Zelda. What hast thou wrought? Despite a smattering of its own ideas, StarTropics is yet another latter day NES effort hoping to hoover up some residual cash from gamers who had exhausted Link's adventures.

You play as Mike, a generic American everykid, visiting his scientist uncle on a tropical island. When you arrive you're informed, by a slightly sinister topless moustachioed man, that your dear old uncle has been abducted. None of the friendly natives seem terribly arsed about this situation, but they give you a yo-yo and shove you in the direction of - yes - an underground tunnel in order to start your quest.

'Virtual Console Roundup' Screenshot 1

While you can earn the expected new weapons, and fill up your inventory with the usual stat-boosting goodies, the bulk of the dungeon crawling is more like a puzzle game than an RPG. Each room is sealed, and opening the exit (or exits) depends on defeating all the creatures jittering about, or jumping on the tiles that trigger the doorways. It's all pleasant enough, though its marred by sluggish controls, respawning beasts and an annoying habit of sending you all the way back to the start should you die.

Progress far enough and you get to explore in a submarine, but it's scant reward for what is a fairly charmless experience. Dedicated retro adventurers might find enough to enjoy to justify a download, but for the vast majority there are other, better, offerings available.

Who do we have to bribe to get ChronoTrigger? I'm serious. Let's have a whipround.

5/10

Alien Storm

  • Platform: Megadrive
  • Wii Points: 800
  • In Real Money: GBP 5.60 / EUR 8.00

It was only when I saw the neon green logo plastered across the screen that I dimly remembered this arcade shooter from my misspent youth. It was one of those horizontal scrollers that I saw endlessly advertised in games mags but never bothered to check out.

'Virtual Console Roundup' Screenshot 2

Now I know why. Superficially similar to Golden Axe, you trundle across the screen in one of three guises - bloke, girl, robot - clobbering small groups of generic alien creatures as they shuffle amiably towards you. Occasionally you can dip inside a building to take part in atrocious shooting gallery stages. Collision detection is fussy, meaning you have to be on the exact same horizontal plane as an enemy to cause any damage, while the treacle-slow pace does little to keep you engaged.

It is, quite frankly, a bland, flavourless slog. Amusement comes only from goofy animations - such as the robot character, Scooter, and his self-destruct smart bomb move - but that's no reason to waste 800 points. If horizontal button-mashing is your thing, stick with Streets of Rage. Or Golden Axe. Or Final Fight. Or Probotector. Or...

2/10

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Picture of Dan.

About Dan Whitehead

Dan has been writing for Eurogamer since 2006 and specialises in RPGs, shooters and games for children. His bestest game ever is Julian Gollop's Chaos.

Read more articles from Dan by visiting the Dan Whitehead archive page.

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Comments (23) Latest comment 4 years ago

Comments threads automatically close after 30 days, but please feel free to continue chatting on the forum!

  • Stupid_Fat_Hobbit #1 4 years ago

    I liked Alien Storm when I was 10. Played it again recently, though, and it is indeed terrible.

  • brainbird #2 4 years ago

    The dude in screenshot one is clearly Saddam Hussein. In his non-earthhole times.

  • brainbird #3 4 years ago

    Also, respect goes to his impressive set of manboobs.

  • brainbird #4 4 years ago

    Yes, it took me 5 minutes between the two posts to stare at the picture.
    Rainy saturday.

  • Kryon #5 4 years ago

    OK, Screen shot one is a greasy looking fat naked hairy man with a mustache who claims he is good friends with your uncle.

    I think someone should call child line ASAP!

  • Thornhillboy #6 4 years ago

    The pointless running parts of Alien Storm were brilliantly stupid.

    And the robot was easily the best character. What a game.

  • J.C #7 4 years ago

    2/10 for alien storm is a bit harsh imo.

  • erp #8 4 years ago

    @azmol01

    In my opinion, no it's not worth it. I was massively disappointed by it. It's much more a straight side-scrolling platformer than a "metrovania" exploratory game, so don't let it fool you.
    Edited by 3 at 12/01/08 @ 12:21

  • Muddtallica #9 4 years ago

    azmol01, erp - To be fair, SC4 isn't trying to "fool" anyone - it can hardly be responsible for the direction the series took after its release, can it? I'd agree that if you're after a modern exploration-based Castlevania you'll be disappointed, but as an old-style action game it remains thoroughly excellent. Just go in there with the right expectations.

    In other news, this is a really rancid week for VC. Good lord.

  • Nithron #10 4 years ago

    Speaking of awesome soundtracks... We need Mick and Mack: Global Gladiators on the VC. Like, now.

  • Dizzy #11 4 years ago

    I loved Alien Storm on my megadrive.

  • Der_tolle_Emil #12 4 years ago

    Horizontal button mashing...curious, are there any people who prefer their games oriented in a particular direction? Y'know - 'Oh, I love those horizontal games, but you know what I can't stand? Those awful vertical ones! They make my stomach go all funny and what an atrocious use of screen space!'.

    Er, or something.

    There's no real point to this comment in any way, btw.

    Depends on the genre. I enjoy vertical shoot 'em ups much more than horizontal ones.

  • Inquisitor #13 4 years ago

    Alien storm was great fun on the mega drive.

    I played it on one of those 4 in 1 type cartridges so it was a great deal at the time.

  • Daryoon #14 4 years ago

    @ erp, Muddtallica, thanks for the help! :) Though if I'm honest I'm none the wiser now! :)

    Super Castlevania isn't like the modern games, it's a remake of the original Castlevania. That means there are linear levels, no exploration, no special abilities - just jumping and killing. And it's rather good, with some clever usage of the-then swanky-new Mode-7.

  • rudedudejude #15 4 years ago

    Alien Storm is Awesome!

    The fast running bits ruled

  • AHiFi #16 4 years ago

    I have been trying for years to find out the name of an alien shooter that me and an old friend used to play back in the day! And then I see the title 'Alien Storm' today, I check out the screenshot and...I read the review. My childlike optimism is then shattered by the 2/10.

    Still, checked it out on youtube. It's the same game alright! Still looks ace! =D But perhaps I shall leave it in the past...

  • cawley1 #17 4 years ago

    See, I said Alien Storm would get a drubbing here in my VC post yesterday, despite it appearing the majority of people above liked it back in the day - Guess it must be those rose tinted specs.

    Oh yeah - I just remembered, if someone does get it, can you tell us if it still says 'GENESIS DOES WHAT NINTENDON'T' on the ranking screen when you die and have no continues left, and the people ranking you are sat behind a desk (it is written on the wall to the right of the screen) I bet it doesn't!!!

    And yes, the music is ace!

  • smelly #18 4 years ago

    >The dude in screenshot one is clearly Saddam Hussein

    I thought it was ron jeremy

  • Daikon #19 4 years ago

    If I remember correctly Alien Storm scored around 9/10 in most gaming mags back in the day.
    Looking forward to seeing gaming sites in 15 years giving a 2/10 to Portal.

  • Azazel #20 4 years ago

    I had completely forgotten about Alien Storm! Played it to death, but would probably ruin all my good memories going back to it now.

  • Azazel #21 4 years ago

    Also: now I realise what game it was that the Super Furries based the video to 'Laserbeam' on... \o/

  • ratso #22 4 years ago

    Alien storm was about as good as side scrollers got. Music and sound sfx were great.

    Perhaps the whole genre deserves 2/10?

  • erp #23 4 years ago

    @Muddtallica

    To be honest, even taken as an old-style left-to-right action-platformer I still found SC4 hugely underwhelming. Oh well.

    Also I think you were taking my comments far too literally: of course SC4 can't be held responsible for the direction the series took in the future. I just meant don't approach it with the expectation of it being the same type (and frankly, quality) game as the later series entries, is all.