Gears book gets name
Pendulum Wars. Or Jim.
Retailer Amazon has finally blown the whistle on what the first Gears of War novel will be called and when it will be out.
Dubbed The Pendulum Wars The Battle of Aspho Fields it will apparently be available in the UK in February, followed by North America in August.
As the title suggests, the story, written by former games journalist Steven Kent, will focus around The Battle of Aspho Fields that made protagonist Marcus Fenix a household name.
It should also fill some of the gaping plot holes left open by the game, and what is clearly important historical background.
The Gears of War novel was unearthed last summer and is rumoured to be part of a trilogy that will expand the popular shooter franchise.
Gears of War was released on Xbox 360 in November 2006 and shot to the top of both sales and most played charts, scooping buckets of awards in the process.
Pop over to our macho Gears of War review to see why a few steroids go a long way.
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Comments (16) Latest comment 4 years ago
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"Pendulum Wars"
Fnarr Fnarr
It'll be literature for men... exclusive excerpt:
"Marcus reveled in the searing heat of the shower, he stretched slowly, massaging his muscles to relieve the stress of the days combat. He peered through the mist and noticed his comrade Dom walking slowly towards him. Dom's body glistened in the steam, drips of water followed the curves of his well defined muscles.
Dom and Marcus assessed one another Marcus was still soapy, Dom was not simultaneously they decided there and then they should have a pendulum war, laughing they grabbed their weapons and were grappling..."
I don't think it'll be light reading for your average teenage fan or have I got it wrong?
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I saw an extract here:
http://transmog.blogspo t.com/
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No? that must be what the book is for then
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What backlash??
As the usual charge levied against Gears is the pseudo-homo/phallic/macho-sexual undertones rampant throughout the game. I thought my post would reflect that by bringing a little satire to the comments section.
I'm more than happy to discuss my repressed issues with you Dusk. I can see it now, we can read passages from the book to one another after which we could discuss their weapons and how best they could hold them.
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'Fucking grubs!' he screamed, barely able to control his anger. 'Dom I need help over here.
'I'm with you man,' shouted a familiar voice in reply.
Marcus glanced over his shoulder.
'Dom you noob, don't just run through their gunfire like a blind lunatic!!'
But already it was too late. With the tactical foresight of a girl scout hoola hooping through a firefight Dom was torn to shreds by the locusts' gunfire, his bleeding corpse slumping over in no mans land.
'The Cole train will save your ass man!!'
Marcus turned, his face paling with absolute horror.
'No. Not you too Cole. Get-the-fuck-back-asshole... Oh Jesus wept...'
Again, like a headless chicken set alight and put on roller skates, a trusted comrade wildly rushed forwards with suicidal lust into the cross hairs of the enemy, his body juddering as a dozen bullets ripped his torso to tatters.
'ME TOO!!! ME TOO!!! ME TOO!!'
'Damion, for the love of god...'
But already it was too late. Like a card carrying Al-Qaeda lemming, strapped head to foot with C4 and hell bent on martyrdom, his final companion mindlessly threw himself into the hale of gunfire, screaming as life was torn from his body by the enemy's weapons.
Marcus slumped to his knees, one hand raising to his forehead in anguish.
'Who the fuck wrote this shite AI anyhow???' he muttered wearily to himself. 'Oh fuck it, lets go play some Halo multiplayer instead.'
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Ha, I love Gears, but thats hilarious.
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That said a book could even be about you and be somewhat interresting (ok, ok... maybe I'm stretching a tad).
I think I know Gisome type:
"oooh I'm so cool, I play text adventures, and say wise comments about popular stuff (which I also consume)"
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