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Command & Conquer: Red Alert 3 - Uprising Review

PC Review by Jim Rossignol

20 March, 2009

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Hmm. We're going to see a lot more of this kind of thing, aren't we? Standalone expansions that don't even have a retail version at all. Nothing but online content. Uprising is a pure download beast, just on PC, and it's pretty cheap to boot. It's about a third, perhaps even a half, of the length of Red Alert 3, with four short campaigns, and it's all single-player. So that includes a gaggle of further missions all delivered by the same colourful cast of actors, models, plasma-ejecting mecha-troops, transforming robots, and psychic-death schoolgirls. That seems like reasonably good value, after all, why wouldn't we want to play another stretch of the Command & Conquer series' wackiest RTS offshoot?

Well, perhaps because it's piss-boilingly frustrating.

The very first mission is a baffling exercise in face-palming idiocy - a poorly designed onslaught in which confusion repeatedly leads to death. The failure conditions are so hard to control, and so utterly galling, that there's no reason why you'd want to continue playing. Towards the end of the mission the level instructions specifically tell you to avoid engaging the units that you have pass to get out. This is bad enough, but they're sickeningly over-powered. You die again and again. It's as if you're being punished for thinking you want to play some more Red Alert 3. Finally, miraculously, you manage to dodge enough of the instant-death missiles to escape the level. No clever problem-solving required, just run for your life and hope for a lucky break.

It's one of the worst opening levels to an RTS game in memory, and it must be completed to open up two of the other campaigns. Assuming you can be bothered to drag your bored carcass through this demented grind you'll be rewarded with some FMV featuring pretty women and posturing actors, and the unveiling of the rest of the campaign: lots more fighting bears, bombarding bases, and seeing how many robots it takes to rush a Russian tank battalion. The journey into these later levels is a familiar one: heavily scripted scenarios that escalate into the unveiling of ludicrous new units and stupidly overwrought battles against the odds. It's this stuff that show off just how imaginative the EA team really is, particularly when it comes to designing insane units. It's no-holds barred here, as there's no multiplayer balance to worry about.

'Command & Conquer: Red Alert 3 - Uprising' Screenshot 1

First the Dead or Alive movie and now this? Does she want to make a career out of it?

The Russians get a walking missile silo, a toxic-waste-spewing heavy infantry dude who is really rather unhappy with his lot, a bike with a mortar for a sidecar, and a tank with a giant, whirling grinder mechanism on the front. The ever-enthusiastic Japanese guys get a hyped-up mecha warrior, a techno-archer with lasers for arrows, and a giant transforming mobile base head thing that spews missiles into the world. The Allies, meanwhile, seem practically pedestrian with their liquid nitrogen-armed Cryo Legionnaire, and heavy bombardment artillery thing with anti-infantry batteries. They do get Holly Valance reading the news, however, so there are compensations.

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Comments: 1-32 of 32

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FortysixterUK
20/03/09 @ 14:35
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It always been that the command and conquer mission packs have been stupidly tough ( except for the RA2 one ).
Oh well, 15 quid saved
Wastelander
20/03/09 @ 14:39
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This isn't a Legends of Wrestlemania review.
I'm now going to take the orphans hostage.
I hope you're happy EG.
Murderers.
Widge
20/03/09 @ 14:42
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There was a C&C expansion pack available as a standalone on the PS1, that was completely evil.
I'm getting this, but only as its bundled with the PS3 version!
Olemak
20/03/09 @ 14:48
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I like the postergirl tho.
sneetch
20/03/09 @ 14:59
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Something wrong with the adverts or is it just me? The screenshot layer was behind the ads layer.
sneetch
20/03/09 @ 15:00
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For gods sake someone scrawl 6/10 on a piece of paper for Wastelander. ;)
Wastelander
20/03/09 @ 15:01
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:D
jamie_fear
20/03/09 @ 15:06
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@ Widge

I had that mission pack for the original C&C (Covert Ops I believe it was called) for my PC and it was brutally hard. Think I only ever managed to complete a couple of missions in it.
Trinod
20/03/09 @ 15:15
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Where does it say its bundled with the PS3 version?
Xerx3s
20/03/09 @ 15:26
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"Pink bubbles. In this game they mean your wear your organs on the outside of your armour."

*COUGH*

/taps nose
Dizzy
20/03/09 @ 15:26
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EA... the joke of the RTS world.
JonFE
20/03/09 @ 15:30
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Does Direct2Drive that distributes this require any kind of loader when you actually play? If so, will this appear on Steam eventually, as I'd prefer one such app installed?
PinkSpider
20/03/09 @ 15:47
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Retaliation?

Loved it myself. Only played the Skirmish though which is quite easy.
Vistrix
20/03/09 @ 15:50
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I purchased it on the day of its release and Im still downloading it. I can only download it for a couple of hours in a day and when I do, I get very low speeds from the EA server.

I really wish this was on Steam...
Vasenor
20/03/09 @ 16:12
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"I really wish this was on Steam... "

Ouch, that bad is it.

I am thinking of the joyous Steam experience I had with DoW2 and Empire as I am typing this...
GreyBeard
20/03/09 @ 16:18
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A better caption for this article would be "smell my finger".

Flip back to the front page for proof.
Edited 1 times, most recently on 20/03/09 @ 16:18
ChthonicEcho
20/03/09 @ 16:24
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This score reflects the quality of Red Alert 3 itself.
neilka
20/03/09 @ 16:41
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And the review didn't even mention the mission where you think you've won and then the map suddenly expands on the side you haven't been defending and you get attacked by hundreds of the most powerful units.
TheTingler
20/03/09 @ 17:13
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Nah, disagree with Jim here. It's an excellent pack on my opinion. He completely failed to mention the Challenge mode, and downplaying the Allies' Cryo Commanders who talk like Arnold Schwarzenegger as Mr. Freeze is criminal.

And while he mentions the lack of multiplayer, he fails to take into account the more significant lack of co-op. This was one of the most important new creations of Red Alert 3, and it's gone, and the co-commanders too. After RA3's lack of challenge, I'm glad we're back with traditional Red Alert. Anyone who liked the old Red Alert games and hated RA3 should definitely get this.

As for that first mission, it's simple - patience and strategic planning is all that's required. You'll lose a few times, but do you want to win all the time?

And more importantly - I'm always suspicious of a review that spends most of the time talking about the very first mission. I once did an essay on five books for English, and I chose to write about their beginnings. Why? Because that's all I'd read, of course.

There is hours of play in this pack, far more than you'd expect from a simple PC download only expansion - although yes, I'll admit there's a lot of frustration in there.
Edited 1 times, most recently on 20/03/09 @ 17:14
Hermiod
20/03/09 @ 17:25
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JonFe - No it doesn't require any sort of loader or any additional DRM beyond that which EA uses themselves. It's a normal HTTP download that you can pause and resume. The only problem you'll have is if you try to use Internet Explorer to download it as IE has trouble with downloads of more than 4gb.

All you get in the zip file is what would be on any ordinary PC game DVD.
dacicus
20/03/09 @ 21:12
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Errrrr, first russian mission, someone forgot to dash with one tesla trooper, disable the goddamn artillery (you have an EMP ability, right?) and flak it to the kingdom come???? There are strategies in Uprising and from my point of view, this expansion is a return to the style seen in C&C: Covert Ops or the original RA where you've had quite a few missions with a handful of units and you've had to acomplish your objectives. Sure, some missions are the classical grind, but other do require some careful planning. It's not called a RTS for nothing. S stands for strategy, right?
And the Challenge mode is fun. I've found the Co-op mode in SP purely idiotical, as the AI was borderline stupid, so the removal of that it's not entirely unwelcomed. You should be able to play Co-op Campaign, if you want to with your buds, but you should not be obliged to pair with a poorly designed AI if you don't have a friend to play the SP Campaign with.
Bottom line, Uprising it's fun. Despite all its obvious flaws, delivers bit of a ride. And the campaign wher you get to play Yuriko Omega was tremendously fun. But goddammit, they should have made it a lot bigger....Yuri must be jealous on his alternate future counterpart of japanese descendance and female gender.
JonFE
20/03/09 @ 21:43
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@Hermiod:

Thanks for the info, really appreciate it!
TheTingler
20/03/09 @ 22:30
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Thanks dacicus, glad someone else agrees with me!
hags
20/03/09 @ 23:53
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This is the second review that I'm reading which is focusing almost solely on the balance, or the lack of it. And I must say, I'm heavily disappointed. I completed the 1st Soviet mission with relative ease, and I'm someone who couldn't even beat a skirmish in SC due to lack of patience and skill! It's really very simple- Against the Athena cannons and Guardian tanks you use the combination of Molotov cocktails+ magnetic mines, tears apart vehicles in mere seconds. Against infantry, you focus your conscript fire or send the Desolators later on. And at the end, you really have to avoid the Pacifier's fire- That's the whole point! There's no imbalance if you get out of the pacifier's shooting field, which is indicated before it really does. Why would you focus getting in the line of fire or even beating them if Dasha told you not to? And the scientists should never stop on their way to the port. I am deeply sorry that your impatience biased your view on the mission, since it's one of the best from the whole game- A new, vastly different tile set, eery atmosphere, fresh soundtrack, infantry-only. I am appalled that the team gets such incomprehensibly low ratings for a game that is imaginative/diversified and catering to the old-school WW-fans at the same time. Alone for the lack of mentioning of the Commander's Challenge I'd recommend re-reviewing the game by someone else. Since missing that is almost felony :P Have you played on "Easy" settings? And why didn't you mention the great map design, music and unit personality? Lastly, if you're on the same page bar the balance, why aren't these factors worth more?
Edited 1 times, most recently on 21/03/09 @ 00:00
dacicus
21/03/09 @ 07:44
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It looks to me that this review was done too hastily. Certainly, the game won't win any awards, but 5/10 it's a bit harsh, especially when you see how many aspects of the game were left out. A 7/10 it would be a fairer rating. No one here says that this expansion is a masterpiece. The things that I don't like about it are few: the AI it's still dumb, doing the same unit spam as usual, the girls can't act, even if you put them in the front of a firing squad (and no I'm not a fan of Gemma Atkinson as Eva), but also I don't forget the fact that RA was intended as a wacky spin-off for C&C universe.
It's just me or the so called actresses put some weight since the release of the original RA3?!! They look more like some chiks that came out from a Rubens painting, rather than the supermodels who were presented in the original RA3.
Adding to that review the fact that the Desolator unit it's just reintroduced to the RA universe, as we've seen it action for the first time in the RA2. Only the design is different, but it's basically doing the same thing. The Cryo legionnaire it's a version of the old Chrono legionnaire (loved the Chrono legionnaire in RA2). As for the game balance, i think that every single unit has a counterpart to stop it.
And I might not be wrong when I'm saying that many people love the new OST. So as far as I'm concerned, this expansion deserves the money. For 15 quids, you get a full fledged expansion, and don't forget about the fact, that in our days, that's the price tag for some bad DLC's. So the quality/price report it's pretty good. 15 missions, the Challenge mode, new MP maps, new units, I'd say you get quite a bit for that price tag.
Hermiod
21/03/09 @ 11:39
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I'm with dacius on this. All I wanted was more maps and maybe some new units. £15 is a fair price too.
Sunyavadin
21/03/09 @ 18:21
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EA... a massive joke at the expense of the gaming world.

Fixed that typo for ya.
floppylobster
21/03/09 @ 22:54
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Expansion packs need to be hard. They're for the people who have played the original to death, people who need a new challenge. Some people go on and on about the prevalence 'casual' games, then a hardcore one comes a long and they bitch that it's too hard? I'm playing it through on hard and it’s a nice challenge, not nearly as difficult as Covert Ops or Age of Empires 2 on hardest setting. Players must be getting softer. You have to think, micro-manage and use special abilities to their full advantage. It's what the Strategy part of Real Time Strategy means.

The opening levels are hard to pass because you can't just point and click your tanks to kill everything. Uprising actually teaches you how to play above the level of a tank rusher by forcing you to learn these advanced techniques. If you only want to play to win and feel good about yourself then just play a skirmish on easy or something by PopCap games.

7/10
Edited 3 times, most recently on 23/03/09 @ 05:40
Tlaloc
22/03/09 @ 04:09
#29
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The only good thing about this series is the astonishingly good cover art. I'd happily pay for big examples of it... without all the crap emblazoned all over it. In fact, I'd use the money I got from selling the game.
notmyrealname
22/03/09 @ 19:53
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If you think it was an 8/10 for you, then be happy with it? I mean you can disagree with the reviewer, but posting your alternative score? If you want to review a game, gamespot has these self review pages that you can type out if you care to inform ppl. But posting it here.. sounds so.. unneccesary, even immature.
floppylobster
23/03/09 @ 05:48
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Shit, the internet has rules now?

It seems natural to me for someone to post what they thought it was worth, that way anyone wanting to discuss it with them knows exactly where they're coming from. It also allows you to skip right to the bottom of my comment and ignore the content of what I wrote.
Luckz
26/04/09 @ 20:11
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I bothered to log in to add notmyrealname to my ignore list.
Seemed like shit initially, but based on these comments it may actually be worth a look. Thanks guys.

Comments: 1-32 of 32

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