Army of Two Comments by Oli Welsh

"What I meant to say is that I'd have hated Army of Two to have been a truly great game because I've gone off shooters at the moment so I had no intention of buying it anyway"

You could always have waited a few months till it's platinum or discounted or whatever and see by then if you're into shooters again...

GZA or no sale.

I'm so sick of these American gung-ho games.

Waldo: I'm sorry you have to play it. :(

He might not have to play it but he does have to put up with it plastered all over the web and can feel dejected that hunk of shite jingoistic crap like this seems to be the pinnacle of the industry these days.

"He might not have to play it but he does have to put up with it plastered all over the web and can feel dejected that hunk of shite jingoistic crap like this seems to be the pinnacle of the industry these days"

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

I mean come on. I agree with the negative points, but I think we are getting rather too sensitive if we start whining about the meer existence of games we don't like. "Plastered all over the web" is pure exageration and you know it.

And for the occasions on which you do find youself confronted by some small snipper of AoT info, I've got the medicine. Its called "closing your eyes and moving along".

haha tango, whiskey, alpha, tango. Genius.

Spelling out a vaguely rude word in the phonetic alphabet is genius??

You must be constantly amazed with the modern world!

"Spelling out a vaguely rude word in the phonetic alphabet is genius??"

I agree, it would have been genius if the full sentence had made sense as well. Now it's merely funny.

A seven is deserved, the storyline is disjointed, the action is broken up too often, the controls can be a little fiddly at times, it all feels a little uninspired and I can't help but feel they intended for the game to be longer a few months ago but just cut out a load of things.

All those things aside, I am having fun playing it. Mowing down some arabs and then playing air-guitar on a big gun is just the kind of thing that tickles my fancy, and tilts the game towards an 8 for me.

An the homophobic undertones of the review remind me of that scene in Grease where John Travolta and Jeff Conaway hug then act all tough. Seriously EG, lay off the "large burly men shooting things together = gay" theme, it's not really funny.

Roll on Friday. Can't beat a bit of co-op shooty joy!

Seriously EG, lay off the "large burly men shooting things together = gay" theme, it's not really funny.

It is funny, and it's also accurate.

Inspectah Deck & RZA as far as the lyrics go.

Halo 3 co-op is just average, stop ass kissing Halo 3 will you. I only got to about the 3rd level on co-op before boredom set in. Why oh why people keep building this game up i don't know. The people who benefited from Halo 3 the most are the owners of E-bay. Enough of the hype now, lets move on.

Played this in work today, two missions in and I'm loving it, suuure it's not looking like one of the all time greats but it's a whole lot of fun, has a really good and intuitive set of controls which feel nice and steady with the aiming/movement and it's spot on with collision detection.
Don't be put off by the silly machoism as it's clearly taking the piss out of itself.
I'd say if you were ''ummming and ahhhing'' about whether or not to get it then go for it!
Any game that within the first 10 minutes has a guy poking another guy's eyeballs out with his thumbs and then goes into a setpiece where crazy suicide bombers are running at you and you have to shoot 'em before they blow, must be worth a look.

Ghostface
GZA
Raekwon (When paired with Ghostface).

Dead Heat!!

Honourary mention Inspecta Deck - For the mosts explosive opening verses of the Clan

"It is funny, and it's also accurate."

Well then you'll really have to explain that one to me.

Poo - Tang more like..

/retires as I will never better that in any aspect of my life

"Halo 3 co-op is just average, stop ass kissing Halo 3 will you."

I'm no Halo fan, but what games have better co-op than Halo? Couldn't name one (but then again, I don't play co-op games).

This is a game built on co-op play, so obviously it has all the options open - split screen, Live/PSN, LAN play...

Wait. No LAN play? So if you have 2 360s in your house (I don't, this is just an example), such as 2 brothers both owning them, they both have to be on Xbox Live Gold just to play, even if they're only in bedrooms next door to each other? That's an awful oversight.

Still, irrelevant as I have no interest, but a co-op game without the option to system link seems like a strange thing to forget.

they keep booting system link off so people can't use tunneling services to avoid xbox live fees... but this game is getting a bit boring now on mission 5. too many enemies, they took too many hits... when enemies get near you aiming is terrible. but I keep playing....?

He spelt TWAT out in his RSS feed/post! How rude!

Mnn now this game doesnt sound as great as I expected to be... =/

might still check it out

Ghostface

Worth a punt at 20 quid or less, I reckon.

Played this last night. Just single player so far.

Thoughts.

1. Agrro system works really well, especially because you can give you partner passive or aggressive variants of each order. It ends up being quite by the numbers, but feeling like you are in control is a good thing.

2. Other co-op type stuff like climbing and co-op sniping (which with an AI controlled partner is doubly pointless) is hollow and feels like it during play. Back to back is tolerable, but to be honest its not really much fun to be forced out of cover in a game that is based around cover. Parachuting feels the same, tolerable but not really much fun.

3. The exception is the portable shield, which is a lot of fun, and would be even more so in co-op mode (as a human player would probably choose sensible targets to shoot).

4. The whole slapping on back or kicking in nuts stuff is utter bollox. I tried it once or twice, found it utterly without reason, and forgot all about it. I wouldn't feel grumpy about it, except that I know the manhours spent on all that tosh could have been put to better use elsewhere to polish up something of substance.

5. The plot is thus far somewhere between shite and offensive, but I always knew it was going to be. It doesn't bother me, I just hum to myself during the cutscenes. No doubt people will rattle on in years to come about the plot being great, the way they do with MGS games (though let it be said, the plot in AoT is far worse).

So it would seem that the co-op stuff you can use anywhere is good, and the stuff that relies on scripted set pieces is shite. No big surprise there really.

Overall I think the review is about right. I am surprised, as I expected it to be worse after seeing recent movies. But I'm still playing it, which is a good sign. One final note, the control system and UI is pretty poor and below the bar set by EAs more recent work. Like I said, not played it co-op with another person yet, and I expect that to increase the fun somewhat.

Maybe Halo 3 has 4 players co-op but the king of co-op is still Gears of War :)

I'd score it 6/10. The third person look and feel of it reminds me a lot of Frontlines and Fronlines is better than Army of Two.

these Games have better co op than halo3

GRAW1&2 (these two games have 16 player co op)
Splinter cell conspirousy theory
Gears of War

Peew971 - Gears is fooking boring in co-op, and in no way superior to halo3 in this department. Come to think of it Halo3 stomps Gears in every single department...

hmm.. see what you made me do. :)

So I'm hearing stories coming up that even splitscreen co-op requires both players to be logged into a Live account (possibly Gold, not heard about Silver). Is this actually the case? And if so, how can something like that go unmentioned in the review? That's a pretty big point if it is true.

@darleysam

Only one gold account is needed for split-screen.

Yeah, I'm hearing some conflicting reports now. Some people saying they couldn't get it to work with anything less than two Gold accounts signed in, others saying they had no such need, got it to work with two non-Live accounts. Could just be some confusion in the reports, with people mistaking Live accounts and just profiles on the console, but it seems pretty strange.

Hang on a minute. Why should anyone need a gold account for split screen?

Its local. Running on a single console. Nothing to do with networks of any kind. What if you don't have internet access; does split screen co-op then not work?

That sounds bloody ridiculous, surely some confusion has slipped in here, can someone clarify?

Method man or no buy for me, who cares if lyrics are any good if they don't nursery rhyme

plus there was one rap where he said he was standing with a dynamite stick with no pants on +1

i cannot actually beleive games have got so lame the characters would discuss such tripe, shamefully i am still considering buying it after this, as long as there is no rap in it it could still be Ok

"That sounds bloody ridiculous, surely some confusion has slipped in here, can someone clarify?"

As you own the game, it should be quite easy to find out, no? ;)

Kangaroo, yeah, it was a batch of misleading reports. I now understand that there's no System Link LAN play at all, the only way to play across two consoles is via Live, therefore needing two Gold accounts. Calling this 'no local play', some people were interpreting it as no splitscreen play without two Gold accounts. Mass stupidity ensued.

@darleysam

Thanks for clearing that up!

@Les

I have been playing the PS3 version.


@JSPOOLE

If you don't know what someone has done, or why they are shooting at you, how do you know if they are a terrorist? Or is it enough to know they are wearing a turban?

a 7/10...
lolea

also, almost every game is gung-ho, except farenheit, which was subtle.

"also, almost every game is gung-ho, except farenheit, which was subtle"

What?!

What?!

also, almost every game is gung-ho, except farenheit, which was subtle

Fahrenheit wasn't published or made by EA... wtf are you talking about?!

"I have been playing the PS3 version."

But you have a 360 as well?! What made you get the inferior version? ;)

Bought it, played it for a while (single player) found it to be run of the mill & pretty boring to be honest.

Yes it looks pretty, tho I found their use HDR lighting was overkill and got damn annoying pretty quickly. The dialogue was so-so, the plot was, hell... I forgot what the plot was. Stopped playing after a couple of hours because I was bored. Can't remember where in the world I was fighting, who I was fighting or why.

The cover system was damn annoying, the hit detection suspect, and the co-op AI seemed to do some damn stupid things. For a game that's "borrowed" so much from Gears of War you think they would have least implemented a decent cover system!

I'd rather they'd have spent the man hours they wasted on the pre-rendered cutscenes (with an in-game engine that looks as nice as it does were they really necessary?) or the cringe-worthy air guitar stuff, in fixing the obviously broken aspects of the single player campaign.

But, since this is a multiplayer game plain and simple I guess they didn't really play-test the single player mode. Or at least thats how it feels to me. The whole experience is just rather bland.

7 / 10 seems like a fair review, maybe a little too high for me, or maybe I'm just being too harsh because I've just finished Half-Life 2: Episode 2... again. (now that's how you do an action game.)

Put it this way I turned Army of Two off to play Timeshift, which I picked up for £14, and found to be much better value for money!

Personally I prefer this cover system to Gears of War as it's much more subtle. The GoW one screamed "Gameplay Mechanic!" everytime you used it, whereas this one is simply intuitive and perfectly functional.

Penny Arcade's friday comic sums this game up perfectly.

@Les

I borrowed it.

Seriously though, if the PS3 version is inferior, I'm not sure in which way. It ran just fine, I saw no frame drops or tearing (could just be my shite eyes of course), and unless you compare screens side by side I'm not sure anyone could tell the difference.

Is that aimed at me? And you keep checking back? I'm flattered.

I ignored the comment because I wasn't really sure there was any point in having a discussion with you about war or the world stage. It was a sideways dig at you, knowing how you would react. A throwaway comment designed purely to annoy.

You've made it quite clear numerous times in the past and now that you are a blinkered machistic Fox news loving war monger, who didn't get enough hugs as a child and now sees the world in binary terms, dividing everyone into either being a manly bomb-droppin' hero of "freeeedom" or a liberal terrorist loving pussy (people that use the word liberal as an insult make me laugh, every time).

I am neither a nursery nurse, nor a psychologist, so I can't really help you either way.

Brutal rebuff indeed, puleese.

"(people that use the word liberal as an insult make me laugh, every time)."

TBH it makes me want to cry... Just like people using the word conservative as praise. What on earth is good about ignoring progress?!

Btw, the 'inferior' comment was an attempt at being funny and in anticipation of EG's next face-off article... ;)

I like the cheesy atmosphere of the game.

First thing that went through my mind when I discovered the A-button does the "High 5" and other silly moves like slapping your partner over the head was: Rios' and Salem's MOST EXCELLENT ADVENTURE COOL!

twats